Padawan

“Carve your name on hearts, not tombstones. A legacy is etched into the minds of others and the stories they share about you.”

~ Shannon L. Alder

“Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.” Philippians 4:9 (KJV)

“And the things that thou hast heard of me among many witnesses, the same commit thou to faithful men, who shall be able to teach others also.” 2 Timothy 2:2 (KJV)

MULTIPLICATION

Multiplication is just a very fast and efficient form of addition. If you want to leave your mark in life, this is one math fact which you will want to embrace, because multiplication is the best way to ensure your legacy. It is though the lives of others you invest in as a mentor, that you can have your greatest impact.

We sometimes call a person being mentored - a disciple. A disciple is a person who follows a leader and they do something more; a disciple reproduces themself in the lives of others who come after them. So we have two important aspects of discipleship; copy and multiply. These two ideas can change your life and even change the world! If you don’t multiply your beliefs, practices and experience in the lives of others, they will soon be lost.

Do you remember the Star Wars movies? They tell about a religious sect called the Jedi who had a very strict system of training their understudies called "Padawans." Their whole plan went wrong when they failed to properly mentor and govern one from among their own ranks and he became their nemesis. Darth Vader was a disciple … but of the wrong leader. He became the Dark Lord of the universe as a direct result of ineffective discipleship by the Jedi. I am not saying that if you do not properly disciple those under you, they will bring the universe to ruin - but it is something to think about. What could you be doing right now to properly guide those who look to you for leadership?

The philosophy of reproducing ourself through others relates to raising our children as well as training our employees and the impact we have on any others who may be looking to us for leadership. It is a universal truth that we will reap what we have sown.

I have been blessed to have a series of great men who have invested in my life to guide me when I needed it. It has not always been easy to receive their input but because the relationships were built on love and trust, there was a solid foundation making it easier. We all need to be looking around us for someone we can invest in and for someone to invest in us – it flows both ways. I never met a successful leader who did not have a series of mentors helping them and I never met a wise man who did not seek to mentor others. The choice is yours to take this admonition seriously; copy and multiply. That is the best way any of us can leave a lasting legacy and assure our long-term success.

Essential Insight – “Multiplication is the only math that really adds up.”

What Happened to the Light?

“I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live by the light that I have. I must stand with anybody that stands right, and stand with him while he is right, and part with him when he goes wrong.” ~ Abraham Lincoln

The light was there first and then came the darkness. We have lost our way and wander in darkness. Unless we seek out the light we will be lost. But where do we go to find the light and how can it be restored so we can all walk in the light continuously and habitually?

The first step is to realize that we ourselves are not the light. That is not to say that we cannot have light within us or that we do not have any good in us at all. But our natural propensity is not to seek out the light but rather we love the darkness more than the light. You see light exposes darkness and we all have some dark secrets and behavior that we would rather not have exposed.

When we are committed to bring the light to those in darkness, we will face adversity. I was raised in a very strict and conservative environment. There is nothing wrong with that and I am not ashamed of it. But my mistake in that early stage of life was to think that those in darkness were somehow not as good as me… and I definitely gave off that vibe. This was very unhelpful in my relationships and alienated me from those who needed what I had access to. So the second step is to realize that we are just mirrors who can reflect the light but in substance we are no better than those in darkness. We are all really the same. If we do not grasp this immediately, we are destined to lose contact with those we seek to serve. Someone has said it best when he said,” we are just beggars seeking to show other beggars where we have found bread.”

The light can be found only on a spiritual plane. It is not the way of the world and the world generally does not operate according to the light. Again, we see many good things in the world and they are useful to us, but we should not be deceived into thinking that the world is friendly to the light. Its systems are dramatically opposed to the light and they will undermine our journey to the light if we do not stay vigilant.

Let’s take the notion of love as an example. I love my wife and she is precious to me. But that does not mean I always act in love toward her in every situation. In fact, most times I act in my own self interest and not hers. I don’t mean to behave in this way nor is it my design, but I naturally slip into this pattern if I am not constantly vigilant.

The third step is to realize that our combined light shines brighter than we can ever shine alone. By that I mean that we should associate with others who have the same values, encourage one another and hold one another accountable to operate in a certain way. Community is essential to light-bearers. We cannot fight this battle on our own and if we try to do so, we will fail. Seek out those who walk in the light.

Lastly we have an obligation to take the light to those in darkness. Most people who walk habitually in the darkness do not consciously understand their plight and will not naturally seek out the light on their own. I have been fortunate to have a series of very committed and wise friends in my life that brought the light to me. At times it was painful when they revealed my darkness to me. They had to be persistent and patient with me and teach me how to be a light-bearer over many years. I can easily slip off the path if I do not stay alert and practice habits that will keep me in the light. Their light exposed my darkness …many times without saying a word. The comparison of my behavior to theirs was often enough to help me see my error. Will you join me in seeking to be a light in a dark world?

“As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being.” ~ Carl Jung

What Grows in the Dark?

“Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.” ~ Terry Pratchett

Among other things, I am a professional life coach and consultant. In that pursuit I have learned over the years that honesty is one of the most important character traits a person can possess. How do we protect that core value? We maintain and cultivate all important core values by making ourselves vulnerable to others and establishing some form of personal accountability. The reason for this is very simple: when left to our own devices, we will cut corners and cheat every time! This fact is as solidly established as the law of gravity. Be careful! You cannot trust your heart or conscience. Over time we will change our convictions to fit the circumstances and our philosophical standards will not hold. We can talk ourselves into almost anything over time.

Some of my closest friends bristle at the idea of accountability and I don’t blame them. Opening our heart to others leaves us very vulnerable and they can hurt us if we do not choose our confidants carefully. Even when extremely cautious, we will sometimes be betrayed. But the prize is worth the risk and the more vulnerable we intentionally make ourselves, the stronger we will become.

I had a very close friend who did not understand this principle. Consequently he had many secrets. Over time he amassed so many dark secrets in his life that he eventually imploded and came apart at the seams. He developed an alcohol and drug problem; he was addicted to pornography and eventually his family and professional life came apart. When I say we were close, I mean that I loved him very much and yet he never came clean even with me. When he eventually committed suicide, I was devastated. I could see the erosion in his life, but I was helpless to assist him because he would not let me in. His secrets kept on growing in the dark and eventually they became monsters which destroyed his life. I become emotional even speaking about his loss. It haunts me to this very day. He was in many ways a fabulous human being and far superior to me, but he never learned to expose his secrets to the light and they crushed him.

You have heard it said that “no man is an island” and it’s true. You must engage others in your life and trust them to care for and encourage you along the way. You cannot bear your burdens alone. Bring them to the light and they will die. Leave them in the dark and they will grow. They will only come into the light kicking and screaming. It will be painful and they will fight you all the way, but the reward may be to save your life. There is no substitute for honesty and accountability between friends.

“Est rosa flos Veneris cujus quo furta laterent.”

“The discourses of the table among true loving friends are held in strict silence.” ~ Sir Thomas Browne

Crutches

My beautiful daughter had an injury recently and needed crutches to get around for weeks afterward. Actually, she needed more than that, but her crutches were the last thing to go. It wasn't easy to give them up either. At first they were essential and then they became less important physically but more and more important psychologically.

Eliminating your crutches is not as easy as you might think. There is a fine line between giving them up at the correct time and giving them up too early, which might cause you to develop a limp that you could carry with you the rest of your life.

We all have something we use as a crutch. When we are in trouble a crutch may be just the thing to help us out; that’s not entirely bad, but we need to get rid of the crutch at the right time so we can learn to walk on our own again.

This may sound counter-intuitive, but nothing is meant to be our perpetual crutch. In reality, the plan is for us to eventually be able to stand on our own intellectually, emotionally and psychologically. We will never be able to handle all our own problems, but we must learn to be normal to the fullest extent possible. We are all dependent to a certain extent but we must not be permanently debilitated by our situation or circumstances. The goal for each of us is that we would be complete and whole as an individual.

The danger is in not finding the balance between trying to go it alone in life and ending up limping through it, or never trying to walk on our own and not maturing to become that which we were intended to be.

“Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work.” ~ H. L. Hunt

Trad'in Up?

Do what you can, where you are, with what you've got." - Teddy Roosevelt

I was raised in the home of a medical doctor. Dad made a good living and provided just about everything we wanted as I was growing up. But the fact is that he and my mother scrimped and saved just to get through Medical school and it profoundly affected both of them and the way our family viewed money. As a result, I don’t waste anything nor am I a spendthrift. When my wife and I first got married, we had more conflict over money matters than probably any other issue – that was 30 years ago and things have changed drastically in the past three decades.

As I was watching TV, I saw an AD for the latest, greatest phone and it occurred to me that I never wear out my phones; I just trade them in on new ones with more and better features - the same is true of cameras, computers and the list goes on. How about you? Our culture is accustomed to “trading up” not “wearing out” the things we use in our life.

What about non-technology like clothes or cars and maybe even relationships? We had some long-time friends who seem to have traded us in on new ones about 2 years ago. When we asked why we didn’t get together anymore, the reply was that they were moving into a different season of their life. It wasn’t just us. They dropped out of church and don’t communicate with most of their old circle of acquaintances. Their decision was very painful and oh so unnecessary.

I see this occasionally in marriages too. One spouse just trades their husband or wife in on a new model. I don’t get it. Well, maybe I can understand getting a new phone, but not a new partner! Figure out how to make your life better by you becoming better, not by ditching those who love you. That will never work, because you will still be stuck with you and that is probably what was broke in the first place… and maybe some of that other old stuff is worth hanging on to for awhile longer? I’m still waiting for my old friends to wake up and come back home.

"Figure out how to make your life better by fixing the old stuff when it breaks."

The Great Escape

“I like to listen. I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen.” - Ernest Hemingway

A leader knows that being a good listener can lead to opportunities to speak words which may powerfully affect other’s lives…and there is always the chance that he might learn something too!

One memory stuck in my mind is of meeting the famous Hollywood leading man, Steve McQueen. I first spied him sitting in the front balcony row of a California church drinking up the speaker’s every word, as he carefully followed along in his own well-worn Bible.

This story had its beginning months earlier. You see Steve had a love for vintage aircraft and to learn to fly his plane, he hired a very gifted flight instructor who was a man of few words. Over the weeks Steve and his instructor spent a lot of time together in the cockpit of his plane. During that time Steve noticed something different about his instructor - so he asked him what it was. Until then, the older instructor had mostly listened to Steve and only dropped in an occasional word of wisdom. But after weeks of patiently listening, he had earned the privilege of saying something very important - so he answered as best he could. That day Steve McQueen found some answers to his quest for personal meaning through the well-placed words of a good listener.

Like a lot of us, for many years Steve thought he had all the answers and was not seeking guidance from anyone. But because a wise man had been a patient listener, his heart changed and he was transformed into an absorbent sponge ready to soak up any advice that might bring more meaning to his life.

You may be familiar with one of the memorable roles McQueen played on the silver screen in The Great Escape. In that movie, he portrayed a soldier trying to get back to safety by motorcycle from behind enemy lines in his escape from a prison camp. In real life, Steve McQueen escaped his prison of hopelessness and futility because someone took the time to listen to him. This quiet listening leader helped Steve to escape the barbed-wire entanglement of frustration which had ensnared him for so long.

A mere two years later, with his body eaten up by incurable cancer, Steve was found dead laying on his bed with a Bible opened on his chest. Because of a good listener, Steve had discovered the inner peace he had been searching for.

“Learn to listen and discover life.”

The King of Virtues

“Forgiveness is the answer to the child's dream of a miracle by which what is broken is made whole again, what is soiled is made clean again.” - Dag Hammarskjold

Coretta Scott King, the wife of the martyred civil rights leader Martin Luther King Jr., was a courageous and strong woman. To me she epitomized forgiveness. When I was living in Atlanta I had the opportunity to meet her and go on a private walking tour of her late husband’s museum. The thing that impressed me most was her ability to resist the hatred and negativity her personal experiences could have fomented in her heart and see how she became a positive force for the sake of the oppressed and down-trodden.

I have witnessed a lot of misery suffered by people who have been abused and hurt by the powers of this world. When we feel we have been cheated by life – we can make a choice either to allow ourselves to become bitter and withdrawn or we can decide to learn from the experience and become better as a result of putting it into our memory bank for future application.

At the age of 16 my parents were divorced and my world seemed to come apart at the seems. I was angry to think that I had been cheated out of my right to be happy. But this was not the end of my life as I supposed. It was merely a temporary detour that eventually helped me move in a very positive direction. Psychologists tell us that it is how we choose to interpret what happens in our life, more than the actual circumstances and experiences, which determines the impact they will have on us. Will our hurts make us bitter or better … we get to decide!

Here is my observation: It is the one who has been wronged who has all the power, not the one who does the wrong. And our power comes in the form of forgiveness. When we forgive we liberate ourselves to live our life more fully. Coretta Scott King discovered that truth early in her life and as a consequence was able to do no end of good for others.

“Forgiveness, in the hands of those who have been wronged, is one of the most powerful forces in the world.”

The Last One to Let You Down

“But friendship is precious; not only in the shade, but in the sunshine of life, and thanks to a benevolent arrangement the greater part of life is sunshine.” - Thomas Jefferson

Former Senator Sam Nunn from Georgia was a wonderful gentleman and a strong leader. In his coat pocket, he always carried a very small leather-bound New Testament which he had received years ago from his special friend, Billy Graham. Mr. Graham was not just a public figure, he was a man on a mission and it positively affected everyone who encountered him. Now that is true friendship; to leave a spiritual impact on those around us! What kind of impact have you had on your friends? What kind of impact have your friends had on you?

When I was in my late 20’s and just starting out in my career, an older wiser man invited me out to lunch because he wanted to have a straight talk with me. He had observed some dangerous tendencies in my life and was willing to point them out to me as a friend. I was surprised and crushed by his words at the same time. From my vantage point, everything he thought he was seeing in me was wrong and I was an innocent person. Oh, really?! In the coming days, weeks and even years, I came to see the truth of some of his observations and at the very least, the danger of appearing to have some bad attitudes by the way I behaved.

That old man remained my faithful friend to the day he died not long ago and his words still help me. But I have had the other sort of friend too. Those who have not stood by me in need and some who were of bad character and dragged me down by their defective world view. Be very careful of the friends you choose. They have a dramatic impact on how you interpret life and the choices you make. The same can be said of business associates, partners, your spouse and anyone else you let into your life. If we choose foolish people to share our world we will end up as a fool our self.

We all need at least 6 good friends because that’s how many men it will take to
carry our casket to the grave. Quite literally, your friends should be the last to let you down.

“Choose your friends carefully.”

It Will Wreck Your Life

“Confidence... thrives on honesty, on honor, on the sacredness of obligations, on faithful protection and on unselfish performance.” - Franklin D. Roosevelt

A dishonest life is full of rot and will be exposed, causing us great embarrassment. It is not a question of “if” but “when” will you be exposed? Writers across the ages have exalted the virtue of honesty. Where does this trait stand in your set of values? I am ashamed to admit that I have sometimes struggled with being completely honest. Maybe you have been tempted in this area of your life too.

Years ago, I learned a very important lesson about verbal honesty that is seared on my consciousness – I hope it will help you as it has helped me. A friend of mine wanted to come visit me for the weekend but had responsibilities at his church which needed his attention. In order to get permission to leave, he told the entire congregation that I had been hurt in a car accident and that he was needed at my bedside. Unknown to my friend, someone in the audience knew a girl I was dating and found out that my friend was lying – what an embarrassment when the truth leaked out!

The theory of six degrees of separation says that no one is more than six relationships removed from anyone else. This idea is not just about networking – it speaks to our need to be honest as well. Once we are proven to be dishonest, it is difficult to regain the trust of others. Confess your lie immediately, take back the thing you stole; don’t let it go uncorrected. It will fester and start to erode your character. You will be exposed and humiliated. Face up to your failure and admit that it is wrong. Then you will have healing and restoration. There is nothing so pure and strong as a man with a clear conscience.

“Determine that honesty will be a hallmark of your life and pay scrupulous attention to maintaining it at all times, no matter what the cost.”

The Oscar

“Winning is not a sometime thing; it's an all time thing.” - Vince Lombardi

Who will win the Oscar? It is always a horse race until the very end, but along the way we are given some important clues. Just as in life, the race does not always go to the hardest worker or most gifted. The award sometimes goes to the most popular or charismatic.

When you are recognized for your life’s work, will you be deserving of the accolades you crave or will the ceremony be a sham in which you can take no pride or pleasure? The choice is yours because the path leading to the winner’s podium is cobbled now as you are far distant from the finish line.

Choices; in the beginning we make them and in the end, they make us. What kind of choices are you making today that will lead you into the winner’s circle despite the dictates of popular opinion?

Live according to the promptings of your heart. You know what to do! Even when they are not immediately gratifying, cling to the values you know are correct. Do what is right. Virtue is its own reward. And when the final verdict is rendered, you will know in your heart that you held nothing in reserve. That will be your reward and no one can take it from you.

“If you give your best every day, you will be given the Oscar for the performance your life.”

What Are You Here For?

“To forget one's purpose is the commonest form of stupidity.” - Friedrich Nietzsche

We do not all have the same abilities or opportunities but we all have the privilege of determining the purpose to which we will dedicate ourselves. A wise man once told me that there were only three big decisions that most of us will ever make in life; who are you going to live your life with; what are you going to live your life in; and what are you going to live your life for? It’s that third question that seems to stump most of us. What are you living your life for?

As a college student, I worked for a time in an automotive plant to fund my schooling. It was a very routine job that I found unfulfilling. Most of my co-workers hated their job and talked all the time about how they would live out their retirement doing what they really wanted to do. Unfortunately most folks don't fulfill their dreams in retirement and more importantly - why would we want to wait? I determined right then and there that I would seek to find a purpose for my life that I could live for each day. I wanted something that made me wake up every morning with thankfulness that I was alive.

Have you found a worthwhile purpose for your life? Success has been defined as: “the progressive realization of a worthwhile, pre-determined goal.” Establish a handful of worthy goals in your life and give yourself fully to accomplishing them. In establishing your life-purposes, start with your relationship with God, your family and your work. These top three areas of your life need the most urgent attention.

“Settle on your life-purposes and sell out to accomplish them each day.”

She'll Steal Your Heart

“I can think of nothing less pleasurable than a life devoted to pleasure.” – John D. Rockefeller

Illicit sex and moral laxity are more readily accepted in our culture than they should be. The implications of this permissiveness go far deeper than one might think. Anything that ignites our desires and passions to the detriment of our good judgment and common sense could be considered a harlot who would potentially steal our heart and fracture our life.

Who or what is the harlot that wants to steal your life? What is it that has potential to bring ruin upon you if you give in to its unhealthy attraction? It might be sex, food, drugs, lust for power or influence – maybe it is ambition. The very definition of an addiction is a compulsion to embrace destructive behavior despite its detrimental effects. We have seen this weakness illustrated time and again in the lives of famous men and women who are consumed by some uncontrolled appetite. Is there anything in your life that you find yourself doing no matter how bad the potential consequences may be?

We don’t usually set out to destroy our self. More than likely, we are just trying to have a good time or escape the pressures of our life for a while by having a little fun. Years ago in Wheeling, WV I met a brilliant flame that burned out too early; his name was Roger Miller. Backstage, Roger was about to go out for a performance. He was drunk and smoking like a house on fire. Roger was a man of great musical talent and humor – a gifted individual, but just a few short years later he was dead of cancer at the age of 56. His untimely death was undoubtedly hastened by his bad habits and a fast life lived on the road. What a tragic waste! All the talent in the world could not overcome the harlot of hard living and the reckless pursuit of pleasure.

If we have a clear mission in our life we will not be easily distracted by the sideshows along the way. A lot of leaders push themselves very hard most of the time and in that environment it is easy to tell yourself that you deserve a little break from the pressure. I agree with that philosophy; work hard and play hard. The problems come in the choice of our play. Take time to relax and give yourself some margin, by all means, but don’t do something stupid that could erase all your hard work up to now.

Find appropriate outlets for your recreation that will let you slow down and enjoy yourself but that do not have the potential to destroy you. Take time to think, rest, reflect and enjoy others – all with the thought of building yourself up, not tearing yourself down.

“Don’t give in to your unseemly passions. Learn to have fun without letting it become wreck-reation.”

Flat Tire on the Fast Track

“He that can have patience can have what he will.” - Benjamin Franklin

An acquaintance of mine bought one of the first DeLoreans to come off the assembly line. It used to belong to John DeLorean himself but he had to give it up. You have probably heard the story of DeLorean’s amazing rise to success in the auto industry with development of the Pontiac GTO and then later his own car make named after himself. But he lost it all; his family, his business and yes, even his car, because he went too far too fast in his pursuit of success. Patience was not a virtue in the fast paced auto industry in which the young and ambitious DeLorean circulated and it may not be in the circles you travel either. Impatience was a major factor in bringing about his downfall; will it bring you down?

What you may not know is that John DeLorean had a major philosophical life-change when he hit the speed bumps of life and reinvented himself as a new person. I think it is safe to say that John learned the truth late in life after he had almost given himself away to his debtors and strangers while traveling down the fast track searching for fame and success.

A very successful and wise businessman once warned me that “you do not go into business but you grow into business.” Take time to build what you want very carefully and thoroughly so it is solid and will resist the bumps in the road that all new ventures inevitably face.

It is never too late to throw our life into reverse if we detect that we are travelling too fast or are on the wrong road. Have courage today. Slow down. Be honest with yourself and work to develop the patience you need to build your own success over time. When we see a door of opportunity, there is nothing wrong with turning the doorknob to see if it will open but a lot of heartache can follow if we break down a door that is locked. I have learned some bitter lessons when I have done this. Being in a hurry to create my success also places a burden on me to sustain that which I have created. On the other hand, when a door is open and I am allowed to go through it without force, I can rest in the knowledge that the timing is correct and the other supporting factors on which I depend are also in place.

“Patiently wait for your success and the results will be greater than you could ever create through the force of your will.”

The Heart of the Matter

“The happiness of a man in this life does not consist in the absence, but in the mastery of his passions.” - Alfred Lord Tennyson

In the West we consider our heart the seat of our emotions but this is not necessarily so in other cultures. For example in Africa it is the liver. So in Africa we would not say, “still your heart,” but rather, “don’t let your liver quiver.” It’s not the words but the meaning that I want to get across; guard your heart!

Our emotions are a powerful force. Do you control them or do they control you? Much evil can arise from our passion or a great deal of good can be accomplished if the focus of our heart is properly directed.

As we mature, we should learn to control our passions; but this discipline requires a philosophical decision we must make well ahead of the practical test. Just as moral spontaneity is a breeding ground for ethical failure, so personal discipline and careful forethought can play an important role in helping us to pre-determine our behavior as we face the challenges of life.

We can lose our leadership in an unguarded moment because we lost our temper. I have seen prominent executives totally blow their reputation and moral authority in the snap of the fingers because of their unbridled anger. Unfortunately it is possible to destroy something you have worked to build up over a lifetime, in a matter of seconds if you let your passions get the better of you.

I once over-reacted to an individual I was directing in a major event. He was accusatory and even insulting in his words and tone. His disrespect was palpable. For a split second I thought,” should I tell him what I think of his behavior?” Before I realized what I had done, I had taken him into a private room and given him a piece of my mind. Well, that was a big mistake on my part. He never forgave me and later even tried to hurt my reputation because I gave in to my anger for just a moment. Even though I was right and won the battle, I lost the war and the moral high ground. My anger made me wrong.

On another occasion, I can remember sitting across the table from a very angry person who dumped a truckload of accusation on me. I felt threatened and wanted to retaliate, but resisted the temptation and kept cool. I told them I was sorry they felt that way and we parted until the heat of the conversation had mitigated. Later, that same individual came to me with an apology and an admission of their own failure in the situation. And in doing so, they told me that my composure had brought them to this realization. My self-control made me right.

I love passionate people but we must learn to contain our emotion through our will and intellect. If we practice thinking through our values and priorities before the adrenaline starts to pump, we can have the mastery over our impulses. Many a high school date has taken a turn towards promiscuity because the couple had not wisely determined what their behavior should be before the windows were steamed up.

Because so few men can control their passions, if you can find a way to channel the same energy you might expend in self-gratification or anger into something positive, you will propel yourself into an elite category of superstardom. Your passion is a steam engine that can be morally neutral and used constructively if you decide that is what you want to do. Use the same energy that would normally erupt as anger or unbridled passion and channel it into a listening and patient demeanor. I absolutely guarantee it will get you a much better result and save you a lot of embarrassment.

“Decide to channel your passions into a positive force in your life.”

Who's On First?

“Action expresses priorities.” – Mohandas Gandhi

Who or what has first place in your life? Is it your job; a hobby; money; your family; self-indulgence? What is at the top of the list? A quick scan of your personal schedule or check book will give you valuable insight into your priorities.

My dog, Gracie, has only one thing on her mind most of the time – food. She is adorable and I love her but if she had to choose between me and a fortune cookie, I would lose every time. Gracie has a clear sense of what comes first for her.

Because you are not an animal, you have the capacity to rise above your natural instincts. Use your mind and will to take charge of your purpose. Discover and, if necessary, re-direct what drives you. What is at the core of your motivation? Scrutinize your values. That knowledge about yourself can unlock amazing power in your life. Remember the objective is not just to get on base but to score; so a clear game plan is a must.

Granted, we all struggle with establishing the correct priorities and sticking to them. But have you ever methodically articulated the priorities you want to embrace? Are you just going with the currents in your life or are you focused on a worthwhile objective? I suggest you inject a little thought and discipline into the process. If you put the right things at the top, every other aspect of your life is more likely to fall into place as it should.

One possible priority could be to put others first. Years ago, a friend of mine offered to introduce me to Mother Teresa in India. I wanted to meet her because she was probably the most famous person of our time to make other people her first priority. She lived it; she didn’t just talk about it. First we determine the direction of our heart and eventually our hands and feet will follow.

People who put others first will always stand out from the crowd. Try to find a way to channel your ambition and energy into something beneficial to others. Maybe the company you work for can give away the product you sell to those in need. Or you can use some of the money you make to help those who are less blessed. If you are stuck in a routine assignment and find it challenging to relate your profession to helping others, then use your spare time to make a contribution to the world around you. If you set your mind to it, you can be a difference-maker.

We are all capable of doing something noble, even if it is less dramatic than Mother Teresa. It all starts with a sense of purpose deep in your heart. Decide what you are most deeply committed to achieving, make sure it is worthwhile and go for it with all your energy.

"Decide what’s important, give it first place in your life and everything else will fall into line."

Little Things Add Up

"Knowledge is power." - Sir Francis Bacon

It is often said that “a little knowledge can be dangerous,” but I have found that an accumulation of many bits of knowledge or experiences gathered over a lifetime can have a very powerful effect.

About 100 A.D., Rome was still a dominant force on the world scene. One of her generals, Quintus Sertorius, found himself far from home in Spain with a vast territory to defend and an army composed almost entirely of undisciplined conscripts. So he called them together to teach them an important lesson on what it would take to be a successful army.

To make his point he gathered the army around the most physically impressive warrior in his ranks along with his smallest and least conspicuous soldier. In front of the great warrior he placed a small scraggly pony and in front of the smaller soldier he placed a mighty war horse. Then he gave both soldiers the task of pulling out their horse’s tail but by two very different methods. The stout soldier was instructed to pull off the tail in one clump and the small soldier was told to do so, one hair at a time. You can guess the outcome. It was the weaker soldier who triumphed over the war horse and the mighty soldier who failed despite all his apparent advantages over the pony; because a horse tail’s strength is found in its many strands.

A wise leader will succeed by collecting, learning from and applying many seemingly small principals for his life’s success. They will be like the multitude of strands in the horse’s tail which make it impervious to being overpowered by the brute force of a single setback.

A foolish person often looks merely to an individual gift, personal strength or single insight for his success. This is a weak approach because there is no unity of purpose or back-up supporting his effort. It lacks insight to let our dreams sink or swim on such a fragile matrix.

Leadership finds its strength through many combined bits of knowledge and wisdom gleaned from our experiences, just as the many hairs of the horse’s tail make it strong.

"Build the probability of your success by marshaling the many resources and knowledge gathered over your lifetime."